THE NOTEBOOK

I watched THE NOTEBOOK last night and I can’t help myself but cry. I wished someone would love me enough like Noah did to Allison. The movie was so sweet and I was so touched.


“Read to me and I’ll come back to you.”


That was what Allison had written on her notebook so that Noah would read it to her to revive the memory of their love.


Gawd, that is so sweet. Hopefully what I dream of would come true.*fingers crossed*


Wanna know what my dreams are? I’ll let you know someday. For now, till the next post.

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Bearing Afflictions with Patience

This is an article by Aisha Stacey. She's a writer for Reading Islam.com. Enjoy.

Before talking about how a believer behaves when ill or injured, it is important to understand just what Islam teaches us about the life of this world. Our existence here on earth is but a transient stop, on the way to our real life in the hereafter.

Paradise or Hell will be our permanent abode.

This world is a place of trial and testing. God created it for us, for our enjoyment, but it is a place of more than just worldly pleasures. It is here that we fulfill our true purpose; we live our lives based on the worship of God.

We laugh, we play, we cry, and we feel heartache and sorrow, but every condition and every emotion is from God. We react with patience, thankfulness, and hope for eternal reward. We fear eternal punishment and know with certainty that God is the source of all mercy and all forgiveness. We read in the Quran what means,

[And this life of the world is only amusement and play! Verily, the home of the hereafter, that is the life indeed (i.e. the eternal life that will never end), if they but knew.] (Al-`Ankabut 29:64)

God did not create us and then abandon us to the pleasures and trials of life. Rather, He sent messengers and prophets to teach us, and books of revelation to guide us.

He also provided us with countless blessings. Each blessing makes life wonderful and at times bearable. If we stop for a moment and contemplate our existence, the blessings of God become evident. Observe the rain falling outside, feel the tingle of the sunshine on your bare skin, touch your chest and feel the strong rhythmic beating of your heart.

These are blessings from God, and we should be thankfulfor them, along with our homes, our children, and our health. However, God tells us that we will be tested. He says in the Quran what can be translated as,

[And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives, and fruits, but give glad tidings to the patient ones.] (Al-Baqarah 2:155)

God has advised us to bear our trials and tribulations patiently. However, this is difficult without understanding that everything that happens in this world happens by the permission of God.

No leaf falls from a tree without God's permission. No business crumbles, no car crashes, and no marriage ends without God's permission. No illness or injury touches a human being without God's permission.

He has power over all things. God does what He does for reasons that are at times beyond our comprehension, and for reasons that may or may not be apparent. However, God, in His infinite wisdom and mercy wants only what is best for us. Ultimately, what is best for us is eternal life in a place of eternal bliss, Paradise.

[Their Lord gives them glad tidings of a mercy from Him, and that He is pleased (with them), and of Gardens (Paradise) for them wherein are everlasting delight.] (At-Tawbah 9:21)

God is All-Loving and All-Wise and knows us better than we know ourselves.

In the face of every trial, a believer must be certain that God does not decree for him or her anything but good. The good may be among the pleasures of this world, or it may be in the hereafter.

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said,

How wonderful is the affair of the believer, for his affairs are all good. If something good happens to him, he is thankful for it and that is good for him. If something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience and that is also good for him. (Muslim)

God tests us with the trials and tribulations of life, and if we bear patiently, we will attain great reward. Through changing circumstances and trying times, God tests our level of faith, ascertains our ability to be patient, and wipes away some of our sins.

God is All-Loving and All-Wise, and knows us better than we know ourselves. We will not attain Paradise without His mercy, and His mercy is manifest in the tests and trials of this life.

The life of this world is mere deception. The most beneficial things to us are the good deeds that we were able to perform. Families are a trial, for God says that they can lead us astray, but equally, they can lead us to Paradise.

Wealth is a trial; coveting it can make us greedy and miserly, but distributing it and using it to benefit those in need can bring us closer to God.

Health is also a trial. Good health can make us feel invincible and not in need of God, but bad health has a way of humbling us, and forcing us to depend on God. How a believer reacts to the circumstances of life is very important.

What happens if the pleasures of this life suddenly become torments? How should one behave when struck by illness or injury? Of course we accept our fate and try to bear the pain, sadness, or suffering patiently, because we know with certainty that from this God will bring about much good.

Prophet Muhammad said,

No misfortune or disease befalls a Muslim, no worry or grief or harm or distress — not even a thorn that pricks him — but God will expiate for some of his sins because of that. (Al-Bukhari)

However, we are imperfect human beings. We can read these words, we can even understand the sentiment, but behaving with acceptance is sometimes very difficult.

It is much easier to bemoan and cry about our situation, but our Most Merciful God has given us clear guidelines, and promised us two things: if we worship Him and follow His guidance we will be rewarded with Paradise, and that after hardship comes ease.

[So verily, with the hardship, there is relief.] (Al-Sharh 94:5)

A believer is obligated to look after his or her body and mind, therefore trying to maintain good health is essential. However, when struck by illness or injury, it is vital to follow God's guidance.

Believers must seek medical aid and do everything they can to bring about a cure or recovery, but at the same time, they must seek help through prayer, remembrance of God, and acts of worship.

Islam is a holistic way of life, both physical and spiritual health go hand in hand.

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My Story

Yes, what i am about to unravel to you is the story of NOW and THEN. Should i start with THEN first? Or should i start with NOW? I think i should start with THEN.

Sorry, can't make up my mind. ;)

Okay, so behold~~~

THEN...

I am a very ignorant girl, complacent with what i have. I never have to worry about anything because eventually, someone will help me. I always pressure my folks because i always want to have everything my way. So, generally, you can label me as a spoil brat.

However, beneath that selfish personality, i noticed that i have a desire to hold on to something spiritual, to have something to reach out to. And so, it happened while i'm in KTT. I realised that part but.....



NOW...

I am a very different girl than the girl i used to be. I feel as if i don't even know myself anymore. Who am i now? I am no longer that girl who used to crouch in the corner, being left alone. I am now more vibrant, happier than i have ever imagined.

I am stronger than i thought. I never thought that though how bumpy this ride is, i managed to stay put on my coaster. Yes, i never thought that i would become the person i am today.

I am pained, by the fact that i need to face this alone, and i am sad, that i have nobody to talk to whenever i am in distress. But that is why we have ALLAH, right?

I won't have to worry that i might bother Him with my dwellings because He is The Most Patient.

I won't have to worry that i might disturb Him if He's sleeping if ever i want to ask for help because He NEVER sleeps.

I won't have to worry if whether if He remembers or not for He NEVER forgets.


All in all, writing this on this blog helps me in organizing my thoughts and well, maintaining my sanity while i do so.


Remember this:

We get, and forget,
ALLAH gives, and forgives.


Till the arrival of another post.

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The Dead End Is Not Dead

Somehow, when things seems to be out of place, and you couldn't think of the solution, perhaps, it's because of:

1. You don't have the experience
2. You don't have the knowledge prior to the matter
3. You freaked out

So what I've learn from this mistake that i did, is that, NEVER EVER doubt that ALLAH will help. As you can see, what i am about to tell you is how i managed to get the solution to this problem.

Earlier this morning, i called IDP to ask about the matter and they said, i won't get a replacement and it is not possible to republish my certificate...BUT what i can do is wait for my placement, i mean for the university that i am going to enter and as i registered, i have to mail them the full address of the university and they will send the result directly to the uni. Meaning, i don't have to pay any fine and i just have to pay for the mailing charges.


Alhamdulillah. =) (lega siot)


Until this morning, i feel as if i have forgotten how to breath again. The funny thing about this whole matter, if i don't pass my cut off point, i won't get to go to the uni in INDIA, and the IELTS result won't be in any benefit for certain. But like a friend of mind said, good things don't happen to people who think badly about the future. True, you have to expect the worst but in the mean time, we should be optimistic, or else, a lot of people would commit suicide each day. Nauzubillah.


So now, i have to pray hard so that i may realize my dream of protecting my iman. Yes, readers, unfortunately, my heart is set a different way. My motive of going to India now, is mainly because i want to protect myself. Pray for me too and i'll hope for the best. Ameen.


Till we meet again. Astalabyebye.

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Astaghfirullahalazim....

Referring to my earlier post, yes, for the entire evening, i've been crying and feeling terrible. I never have been THIS careless my entire life and its costing my placement for the universities that i am going to enter later in India.

So, after moments of crying and wishing myself dead, i went online and tried to distract myself from thinking about it. A few minutes later, a friend of mine asked me about what's going on and i sorely replied that i am not okay.

He asked me about the matter so i told him about it. Eventually after lengths of advices, i finally realised that, hey, why am i like this?

Didn't ALLAH promised paradise to those who are patient?

Thank you Syafiq. :) I felt better now.

So, later, i finally got the solution. So now i will have to call IDP or Mr Razib or whoever that may help me with this. But of course, i think i am going to directly call IDP to ask them to republish my cert and hence, more money is involved.


Aiyaiyai~ I've landed myself in a big pile of shit.


I don't know what's becoming of me. I think this is just the beginning. I think ALLAH is trying to get me to remember Him back since i have been out of focus lately.

"Oh ALLAH, how great is your LOVE?"

I have to be thankful with all this. I believe that i wavered too much already that ALLAH is simply trying to remind me to get back on track.


All i can say is....


Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah.




p/s: I am always in need of a reminder, and usually that came in a harsh way. I am one hell of a girl, so stubborn yet so delicate. ;P

p/p/s: InsyaALLAH i am going to make this through. I am a strong girl, aren't i?

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Me and My Big Mouth

I spoke too soon. Now,congratulations, i have a thing to post after all. Guess what?

I lost my IELTS result.

Double fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffftttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.

And guess what?

I threw it away while cleaning up that day.

Brilliant.

I feel like slapping myself in the face.

Banyak2 bnde, knape bnde tu yg ko buang?

Haih, but actually, after moments of panicking and fidgeting, i am now left with a question ;

"NOW WHAT?"

p/s: ALLAH help me...='(

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A Fresh Start

For the past few hours, i've been literally pulling my hair off and racking my brain choosing the best of the best pictures for my new layout since i felt bored looking at the same background. So, after thousands of googling, these are the final contestants.





Finally, after many hours of previewing, i finally decided and voila! There you have it!

It suits my solitary soul and i like it! XD

Okay, so actually i chose the picture with the girl in it. But after a while, suddenly a thought came to my mind.

"BAPAK semak wey!!! Cmne nak bace????"

Haha, so i figured, x ksahla wpun i dah boring dngan my old background, i will continue using it sbb lg lawa and lg senang nk bace...=P

So x jadi tkar layout...T_T


p/s: Sorry dear readers, i still don't have any idea to post on this blog. Hopefully ideas will come to me sooner or this blog might start to grow colonies of bacteria.


p/p/s: Hey, why don't you request it from me??? Ask me to post about something you wanna know. As long as it doesn't violate certain issues. ;)

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This Year's Graduation Night. Ape cter?

Okay, first of all, i would like to tell you something. I haven't found anything to wear for graduation night and yeah, things are sort of falling out of place everywhere. A lot of things have been going on in the big head of mine. But that was then. Anyway, I FOUND IT!!!!

Yeah, i found The Dress. It's gorgeous and its way elegant!!! I was like starstrucked when i saw my own reflection in the fitting room. I was like " Who the heck am i looking at?" Okay, so, one problem solved. Haha. Well, that's where this whole grad thing started to piss me off.

"I don't know how i am going outof my apartment all dolled up like that."

But that, my friend, c'est un autre chose.

So right now what i have to do is, wait. Yeap, we'll just wait and see.

I don't wanna look this bizarre though.

p/s: Regarding project ANGEL, nothing is bound to happen anyway. But can i make it happen??

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